Real human connection feels a lot like something out there in the universe just goes *snap*. When we allow opportunity for connection to unfold in front of us, and when we are open to receiving it, magic happens. It can be easy enough to lose ourselves in the abyss that is tech and scrolling, it’s not the first time this has been mentioned in a blog or a post. We are in the centre of an “epidemic of loneliness”- a “connection disconnection”. Where the importance of kind tends not to take priority over our days.
Humans are inherently social creatures. Deriving inspiration from one another, we can be constantly learning, growing and bettering ourselves and each other. All it takes is the ability to be open.
By being open to connection in any way it make take its form, we are allowing ourselves to experience more spontaneous experiences. Spontaneity and connection often come hand in hand. You may notice when there is a carefully planned scenario or day, it’s in our nature to grow disheartened when things don’t quite go as planned.
When thinking of connections in that sense, it can be helpful to consider how easy it truly is to be kind.
It takes little energy to be a kind and considerate person. By understanding that everyone has their own muck that they are just trying to get through. Everyone has their own complex little life, and we really don’t know what it might take to bring someone to their knees, so it is so important to be kind.
Active listening.
What does it mean to be an active listener? Everyone should practice active listening. It will help you to become a more present, vibrant, beautiful, alive human — which is literally just putting your phone down and paying attention and breathing with the person sharing something with you.
A few years ago, my nephew asked me if i was a “Real Grown Up” - this immediately intrigued me. Because he was four. I wondered in that second how a four year old had decided what a “Real Grown up” was, and what criteria that might entail.
I told him no, I don’t think I’m a RGU. But what does that mean to you?
Then he said something that will stick to me for the rest of my life. He said “Because I have noticed that when Real Grown Up’s talk to each other, they always say they’re fine, even if they aren’t”
My four year old nephew couldn’t understand why we aren’t honest with how we are feeling. To him, it seemed simple. Just say how you feel. But how did he know that the grown ups sometimes didn’t feel too great?
When we are active listeners, we engage beyond surface level. Loneliness is a huge issue, and it’s getting worse. So the act of committing to listening and sharing with depth, is a radical act these days. It’s much easier to stay in your bubble of safety and stay disconnected, but it may be worth stepping out of that for the value of connection.
Xo Sam.
